Moving and the Vikings are trying to recruit me.

Our Heroine is Back from Chicago. The Side Witch has a move in date for the Windy City. 

Our Heroine goal now is to move out near or before then she might get storage unit to start sorting and moving her stuff into it. That way she will know what she wants to keep. When the Side witch moves our Heroine's Son the Wizard  boy will move up stairs and if our Heroine is out of there then Dear Daughter has a friend that will move into this basement apt. Our Heroine can possibly crash at the Wizard of Aim's while a place is closed on if she can tolerate our Heroine for that long. Depending on where our Heroine will be moving. She is getting pre-qualified asap.  It will be So very close to getting back from Pennsic. 

Right now she is going through all the bedding. There is enough to have 6 or seven beds extra for company ( she has had that much company before.) It is not needed now.animal shelter is going to get a bunch. 

Our Heroine would like  company to come hang and chat and keep her company while she sorts her crap, and remind her to eat and support eating good choices. Maybe come for an hr swim with her in the middle of it all. 

Our Heroine is off Sat and Sunday so sort sort sort. 

 After noon plans sunday with a bunch of crazy Vikings ( Cara, Patrick, Jessica, Pam). I swear the Vikings are trying to recruit our Heroine. However  Our Heroine haven't gotten over her norse past life Her  husband whomever she loved very much died suddenly in an accident and our  Heroine lived a long life feeling alone without him and she never got over it. so they shant have any luck there. She shall stay Tudor. 

Ragnarok & swimming

366 laps+37.25 = 10.83 miles

1 mile foot

5 miles bike

 Our Heroine went to Ragnarok with her friend The Courtier. It was much fun. She was not officially in charge of anything more required to do anything but she brought her games and taught them and entered teens and tweens and littles. Which is why she is a Regional Minister of Youth. She also threw axes and knives and spears. Visited with people 
and committed to going to Baroness war to hang in the Bar running games. 

And some other things she committed too. 

On Sunday our Heroine got home early enough to see her son the Wizard who was moving in. Then ran off to swim a Mile. She wore her size small swimsuit for the first time. While it is a bit snug the med one is starting to fall apart because of the chlorine. She still is not happy with her size or shape but she is trying to have a better attitude about her body.

Monday work again then helped Queen Dork move a shed with Her Gallant Dork helping me. Asked her not to keep finding large things for Our Heroine to move. While there Our Heroine also fix the strike plate on a door so it would latch when shut for them. 

The fundraiser for our Heroine's friend closed out and there is enough for a wheel chair or scooter that will help. 

And she is thinking of either teaching or Merchanting @ Simple day.

Feel lightly even when you feel deeply.

 14+ 352 = 366 laps = 9.83 miles

1 mile foot

5 miles bike

Feel lightly even when you feel deeply. Sounds counter intuitive, however it is not.

But Our Heroine didn't make herself change. It came when she let go of the hate the fear and even some Self-Loathing. Forgiveness is so powerful. But never is it more powerful then when the victim forgives themself. It only happened when she met someone who triggered a desire to be her best self.  She is not perfectly healed but she can now feel lightly now. Even though she feels so very deeply.  And that feels so good.

Healing not for someone else but still because of someone else is not a thing that was expected. The scars one day will fade 

If she's lucky then maybe she'll get to be have someone take a chance on her. 

But...they are proof that She is stronger then that which tried to kill her. 

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It is dark because you are trying to hard.

Lightly child, lightly

Yes feel lightly even though you are feeling deeply

Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them

 ~Aldous Huxley

Pagan Picnic and being tied

 Our Heroine and the Wizard of Aim, Ran the Rampant Strawberry at the Pagan Picnic this week end with the Other Aim, the Side Witch and Mary Moon. Also Tess and Her Love. It was and Adventure. The Wizard and Heroine would be there both days with a pop up either way so the risk was low. Day one was super hot.

Day to was more manageable. Our Heroine made profit for sure. One novelty was a 3 rune reading with hand carved rubber stamps that they stamped on the arm of the client the client also received a business card with the runes description.

Our Heroine has been having Hecatate and Freya showing up a lot lately. Well she does love animals.evwn if she doesn't want to add to her pet collection. She wore her sorry I late I saw a dog shirt the second day. It was very popular. She also bought a new green dress she will wear to the Aztec's relationship celebration. 

Pack up finished at 7 and the Heroine was in the pool doing 20 laps by 745. 

Only did 20 laps.

She decided to take the next day off of exercise. Just her normal everyday work and that was all. She was even to worn out to eat properly she had a QT hot dog, bacon, and frozen berries. Her diet coach would not be happy. 

 332+20 = 352laps = 9.45 miles

Joining a race

Our Heroine went and had her nails cut down and acrylic layered on with gel polish so they are stronger hopefully she won't hurt herself any more. They are the perfect length for nails down a back. A girl can dream.

Our Heroine did a second day of swimming a mile. Then a third day. She is also from naly seeing the scale move again. She is looking at joining a 10 week go at your own pace race.

_______________________________

Our Heroine ran the aquatic class today when the teacher was out. She even chooses the exercises she hates the most. If feels like if she hates them they are probably the ones she most needs to work on. Our Heroine goes hard though she ups the game on each one she does. Cardio is timed but the strength training is by count. Cardio is 30 minutes long strength is 20 min long the cool down stretches. 

The Our Heroine swam 20 laps in 30 min but having went hard on the work out 20 was enough she is sore.  

It is official our Heroine joined the race.

She is also cutting parchment for a scroll for a Pirate friends aoa scroll. Next is art. 

167.4lb today 

237.25 + 94.75 = 332 laps = 8.91 miles

1 moon, 2 moon, white moon, blue moon

Was not feeling the third person thing today . This Sagittarius moon is the second this month making it a Blue Moon. So besides calling in this it is a releasing ritual kind of manifesting time along with calling in manifestation ritual time. 9 & 9 it is a house kind of number if you care please go live ok it up if not know I have a I release list and a I call in list. I could not find the moon after my swim till I finally asked the clouds to move so I could get a good look at her. 

 I told the moon the things I give to it to take. And then erased them from my phone list a List of nine things

 Also the 9 things I call into my life as well.

 I shall not share them all with you except for one. This month between moons I decided to give someone who deserves it forgiveness. I worked on forgiving me, for staying in a toxic marriage, for needing to for survival to care for my children. One of which is my step child so I would have had no rights to. I was a good actor at times when I was at the lowest points I acted as if they were some of our best.  I forgive myself For using that situation to care for my mother through heart attack and stroke. I also am accepting that receiving alimony is not wrong it is survival. I intend to build myself many sources of money income so as not to not need it. Besides I deserve love and will not let losing alimony by moving forward in love hold power over me. I forgive myself all I didn't know, and all I tolerated. I Release with this Sagittarius blue moon that grief. And it leads me to in many ways forgive my Ex not because he deserves it. But because I deserve it. I Release him. ("You have no power over me"~Sarah the Labranth) SO MOTE IT BE!

As you can see me and the moon had a long conversation. She was hiding for a while so I moved the clouds so I could see her in all her Glory. During that time I snapped some photos of her. Blessed be my Luna.

37.25+20=57.25 

57.25 + 180 =237.25

237.25 =6.37 miles

Just another day

 180 laps=4.83  miles 10 laps in 15min

37.5 = mile

Yesterday the our Heroine worked at home making Dinglehoppers for stock for the Pagan picnic this coming weekend. Then went to Aquasize and do laps. The Wizard of Aim made it to the work out so they chose to eat out together.

During dinner the Wizard of Aim stated she can tell if Our Heroine is in a Histamine flare or flare in general by her food order. Seems Our Heroine will actively check ingredients when not doing well.  Our Heroine's far speaker was at 6% so she pre called in for the SCA busyness meeting. 

Today was work as usual. Our Heroine realized she is done being a care taker and will be exploring becoming something new maybe as soon as the fall. She also took on a special request for a neighbor of second client and will we doing some cleaning once a month. Sigh  😔 There was a large wolf spider hanging out in the rest room of second clients tub. It scared Our Heroine buy surprising her when she went to fill the mop bucket. It's name shall be Athena. Or Charlie. Not sure.

Our Heroine scared herself by leaving in a rush to get C-clamps and baking pans for Lampworking before swimming. She left the oven on with a chicken breast cooking and only remembered when exiting the club of chlorinated water. She saw two 🚒 fire engines and had a minor panic as the memory came flooding in, She has never done that before. She called a person who shared the residency and they turned off the oven. The good thing was Our Heroine was racing to swim as fast as she could so she had max time in the shower since the club shut at 9 on Friday and Our Heroine got there at 8:05. She was leaving the club by 8:42

She took 15 minutes to swim. It would have been faster but she had hair under her goggles and they kept leaving the first 2 laps. 

Our Heroine might be ready to buy water 💦 🌊 proof bone conductive head phones. 

Since planned dinner was  in-edible she had to come up with something else to eat for dinner. The fastest thing was some vegan chicken that her daughter had and blue berries. 

Our Heroine need to plan dinner better. She is bad at feeding herself. 30 years of being a care taker leaves her a little meh if she isn't thinking of feeding someone else. 

She did eat salads for lunch 😊